The real thing with ADHD is not “I forgot”, but that forgetting is this ongoing process. I remembered! And then I forgot.
At ten this (hypothetical) morning I remembered that I have a meeting at six. And then from 11 through 3 I worked on other stuff and had zero thoughts about that meeting. Maybe even thought about what I was gonna do with my evening at home. Got attached to the idea of taking the time to make a good dinner, maybe play some video games.
And then at three I said, “Oh! Fuck!” and remembered again, hopefully long enough to set an alarm. And then I went to the bathroom and remembered that I need to clean the counter and spent twenty minutes cleaning the bathroom and went to get a snack and then at five I said, “OH! FUCK!” and had to scramble to dress like a real adult and get out the door.
It isn’t one clean forgetting. It’s a constant process of forgetting and then, with an exhausting adrenaline spike, remembering. And then forgetting. Baby, I can forget the same thing more times in a day than you ever forgot your parents’ anniversary.
Reblog if you want a shitty summary of your blog in your inbox.
Nauseating, by the way, just how prevalent abstinence-only ideology seems to have completely washed through people like. It’s just common now for some shithead to show up like “you think it’s normal for teenagers to watch porn? 😬” Yeah actually it is one of the most historically well-understood axioms of teenagers that they are horny all the time because of puberty. They’re literally in the process of sexual development, their bodies are building and testing the hardware for sex.
Of course every person is different and there’s a full spectrum of sex drive among teenagers, but if you’re seriously expecting most teenagers not to masturbate until they turn 18 you are living in a fantasy. Sex isn’t evil!!!!!! Sex isn’t damaging!!! Sex is not toxic or harmful!!! Sex is just sex, and whether or not something constitutes sexual abuse or sexual harm has more to do with what makes something abusive or harmful, and little to do with how sexual it is.
Also, the idea that children seeing porn is how sexual abuse happens is fully based on gut-disgust reactions and has genuinely nothing to do with the realities of the factors that actually give rise to sexual abuse. Of course it should not be possible or at least likely for kids to just accidentally stumble into porn, but that’s true in general; nobody wants to be jumpscared with porn when they’re trying to do some other shit. If some non-adult is out there seeking out sexual materials, all that matters is that they’re keeping it to themselves and not trying to engage strangers online about it, and that they have a solid foundation of sexual education and media literacy on which to make smart, healthy decisions while doing so.
Sexual development, like all development, happens over time, and starts before adulthood. We need to accomodate the reality that exists, no matter how uncomfortable that reality is. Trying to push to make it impossible for teenagers to see porn is just divorced from reality, and the basis for trying to do so is anti-science. Figure out how to deal with it.
when my shelter cat passes by me, he pauses for a second, and looks up. He is waiting for me to lean down, and touch my hand against his side, so that when he keeps walking, my hand skims across his fur. he doesn’t really need attention. he has his own thoughts and plans. but after more than a year of living in our home, he has come to expect a moment of kindness whenever he crosses my path. if I don’t do it, he will follow me. “where is your hand?” he asks, with his plaintive and impatient eyes. I give it to him. he bumps against it like a balloon before wandering away. this is a poem to me
This post has gone so much further than I expected it to. This is my sweet cat. His name is Eddie Potato.
If you have ever been tempted by a Paleozoic Pal, like a a stuffed trilobite or a full size eurypterid body pillow, now’s the time to buy one, before they and a really lovely little museum are gone for good 😭😭😭
This was the museum I went to often in my childhood. I’m no longer able to visit unless I visit family, but this place holds a special place in my heart.
As stated in the article, they hold around 7 million artifacts- many of which are orphaned fossils, with the museum taking in collections that otherwise would have been trashed.
Please consider buying a Paleozoic Pal, but I’ll also leave a direct donation link as well.
I JUST WENT INTO A FUGUE STATE AND BOUGHT ME A 16 INCH CUDDLE BUDDY WITH PLATED TEETH!! DUNKIE, MY BELOVED!!
Screeching aside, anyone who can afford to, go look through their shop! They got clothes, and cute gifts, and books and all kinds of other awesome stuff! Ye, the shipping sucks, but we need to keep our museums alive! (the good ones, not the British Museum of Thievery XP)
HE’S HERE! MY BIG BOY IS HERE!! (And yes he is my BIG boy despite only being 16 inches, you shush!)
He took nearly a month to get here, but that’s because of ALL THE ORDERS THEY’VE BEEN GETTING! OVER 1800 ORDERS! This is why I love the online community!!
Now if you don’t mind I’m going to tuck Duncan into my sweater and go work on the piles of stuff I still have to do 😅
For anyone curious what’s happening with the PRI they’re digging themselves out! An anonymous donor gave them $1 mn which they used to secure a stay on the forclosure for the rest of the year and they’re approximately a third of the way to buying their way out of the mortgage.
the world is so neutered it genuinely makes me soooo angry. you can’t access any porn web sites in america without providing a selfie and your legal ID. if you save one photo of a shirtless guy to a pinterest board not only will pinterest disable pin recommendations for that board based on their “decency” algorithm, they will notify you that your board violates their policy. this website (and a few others) won’t let you search any nsfw terms or even vaguely naughty words without censoring it for you and saying “this search looked sexy so we’ve prevented you from seeing results!” like what the fuck are we doing? i’m a 28 year old person. i’m an adult. i’ve seen naked people. i’ve had sex. if i want to look at some porn i should be able to do that. if i want to see erotic imagery online then i should be able to do that. what are these websites trying to protect me from? what are these websites trying to stop me from seeing or feeling or learning? why don’t i get to decide what i see or feel or learn?
